Utmost Perfection

Current Mood: MOODIE
Damn! Had O'level Music practical prelims today. It sucked really hard. I almost shed a tear if not for comforting music mates like Liyana, Chunjie and Junyan hanging about. Oh thank you thank you. ^^
However the tranquility could only stretch that long. I stil had to face the fact that one of my pieces really sucked. My ensemble and 1 of my solo pieces was "great" according to Mr leong, but that was little consolation. How am I ever gonna be the greatest violinist if I had flaws like that? Not to mention signing a record with Big Evil Corp. and having to work with Evan.
On the lighter side of things, Liyana and I waltz around the dance studio as the 2 duos played the piano. We acted like dancing partners. it was pretty interesting not to mention really fun. It's all good accept that the we were hopping not dancing. The poor duos had to put up with our nonsensical craziness, however, they're musicians too, so they MUST understand that we do things the way we do! haha
Joe was around luckily for me to pour all my disappointment about my performance today. He always finds a way to make me feel all better and keep me from falling apart. I want myself to be someone who everyone would be so proud of. Why can't I ever stay composed, to be able to just play it? I've been told so many times, why cant I do that? Fustrated with myself.
It's not suppose to be this way. I'm a violinist! So be the best one! Argh! Anxiety.

i'm tugging at my hair
i'm pulling at my clothes
i'm trying to keep my cool i know it shows
i'm straing at my feet
my cheecks are turning red
and i'm searching for the words inside my head

Cause i'm feeling nervous
Trying to be so perfect,
Cause i know you're worth it
you're worth it Yeah.